tales from the schoolbus, episode one.

well lo and behold— another schoolyear has nearly concluded. we have three early release days left on our school calendar, and ohmygoodness, i can taste the euphoric glee of children and teachers and parents county-wide. i do declare, it’s a good time for something new.

in an effort to minimize the chaos of the last day of school’s excitement, i gifted my students early with their end-of-the-year surprises. it is always a challenge to figure out how to Love all of the babies without spending an arm-and-a-leg or without undertaking so much work that the surprise falls short compared to the energy spent.

this year’s surprise was pinwheels — 100 of them for $19.99 on the old buy-anything-anytime-online-store-and-have-it-delivered-to-your-doorstep-in-days. you know the one. albeit, assembly required. but all the way worth it.

because those kids (and a few of their parents) went bananas, y’all. pure delight and childhood merriment in the form of little spinning wheels of color twirling in the breeze of open windows on a summer’s afternoon and the sounds of our funky friday playlist pulsing happiness straight into our collective soul while we rolled down the roads of our beautiful, little town. the vision was that of a scene from a happily-ever-after movie where the heroine was still on her epic quest to finding her One True Love, but wasn’t wasting a minute of Life to soak up the good things while she searched — one that would have your eyes tearing with Joy, your heart swelling with Hope, and your lips singing along to the sounds of laughter and praises to The Mighty King-Love.

it was literally that magical.

but believe or not, an even better story came off of the schoolbus yesterday morning— a totally teachable, hilarious, profound conversation between Papa and me and about 40 elementary aged children. hours before the euphoria of the melodic and colorful ride home.

and that’s where the Good News is found. in the early hours of a friday morning on a simple schoolbus ride—

a few of the boys were slapping hands with one another. third grade boys — 8 and 9 year olds. they were happy, smiling, not overtly aggressive. i watched them for a few seconds in my big mirror that has my students convinced that i’m an alien with eyes in the back of my head. and while their play looked as far from malevolent as could be, i’ve lived enough Life on this planet to know that “play” fighting can quickly escalate into hurt feelings and faces. so i picked up my mic and reminded the collective body of children for the 875624489574897 time this schoolyear to keep their hands to themselves. the hand slapping immediately ceased. the big eye in the sky with the booming voice now had their attention.

so i took the opportunity to ask them if they remembered the golden rule. just earlier in the schoolyear, i had spent the better part of a week repeating the Message over and over and over, trying to plant Good Seeds. but attention spans are a thing, y’all. lessening dramatically by the day in a world upsidedown with instant gratification options everywhere. does anyone retain anything, anymore? do we still know how to hold onto the valuables in Life? do we cling to that which is Good? or just go right back out into the world to fill the voids with more manure? *all valid questions to meditate and pray on.

“does anyone remember the Golden Rule?” i announced over the schoolbus p.a. while we bumped along the path to their school. nearly immediately, one of my favorite little boys shouted, hands cupped around his mouth in bold confidence that he definitely knew the answer to this question: “keep your hands to yourself!”

clever boy, that one. he has already learned that the teachers give the answer before they ask the question. but i don’t teach like the rest of them. never have; probably never will. i’m trying to turn these babies on to curiosity and diving into the deep. not regurgitated indoctrination. but we don’t need to go all the way down that rabbit hole, now do we?

i giggled and replied, “noooo. the golden rule says to treat other people the way we want to be treated. so if you don’t want someone annoying you or messing with you, than don’t annoy or mess with someone else!”

same boy responds, smiling mischievously — “but what if i want someone to annoy me?!”

i told you he was smart.

without missing a beat, i clicked the mic on and spouted, “then i guess you’ll have to wait until you’re married.”

at which point, every single boy on that schoolbus, it surely felt, started howling in delighted entertainment while all of my little girls, quietly taking in all of the ruckus banter, scrunched up their foreheads and looked desperately at one another.

kids are smart, y’all. s m a r t.

once the laughter and desperation died down, i went on to teach them about the “platinum rule.” a lesson i heard taught from one of the religious platform of my yesterdays. the platinum rule goes like this: treat other people the way they want to be treated. i am still not sure how i feel about this as doctrine, but it sure does sound pretty. and exhausting. but pretty, none the less.

as the little children all internalized my words and i watched lightbulbs going off over their brilliant heads, i was reminded, internally, of one of my favorite lessons from Yeshua — that we are blessed when we remain unoffended. and in a world that deifies being offended, i am more convinced than ever that we must learn to let stuff go, y’all.

people are people. even the best-intentioned soul is gonna get it wrong sometimes. even the sweetest-hearted Life is gonna have a bad day. learn how to laugh at yourself. learn how to turn the other cheek. and not in piety, but in Love; in sacrifice. in saying that someone else’s feelings are incredible and valid and recognizing that you don’t have to respond to every single thing that every single person says or does or doesn’t say or doesn’t do that hurts your feelings or doesn’t make you feel happy inside.

for serious, friend. get over yourself.

and teach everyone around you, too, by example, how F R E E Life can be when we Live Unoffended.

and who knows? maybe as you step into the wealthy and blessed mindset of being continuously unoffended by literally anything and anyone, you’ll be met in the afternoon with a wondrous surprise from our Loving Papa.

Love you. mean it.